my kitchen

yes! we have no bananas! however, I do have a lovely banana bread recipe.

February 3, 2013

My mom made banana bread with some regularity when I was growing up. These days I don’t eat a whole lot of bread–in fact I’m starting to think I’m developing an allergy to wheat. I don’t consider myself a carb-obsessed-paleo dieter… but to be honest I have omitted a lot of things from my daily intake including butter and wheat. But fuck it, I had four bananas turning into mush and there’s only one thing to be done with them–banana bread.


Also, I apologize for my language. It’s probably why this blog fails amongst the League of Pinteresters.

Anyway, I did no research for this recipe. I just kind of went for it and I am happy to say it was a success.

David the Tornado’s Crusty Banana Bread

You will need:

  • 1 cup white flour
  • 1 cup wheat flour
  • 1/2 tsp baking powder
  • 1/4 tsp baking soda
  • 1T salt
  • 1 egg
  • 2T butter
  • 4 shots of espresso (or one cup of strongly brewed coffee)
  • 4 over-ripe bananas
  • 3/4 brown sugar (packed)
  • 1/2 cup sugar
  • 1T vanilla extract
  • 1/2 cup crushed walnuts

Preheat oven to 350°F. Sift dry ingredients together and set aside. Hopefully you have a Kitchenaid stand mixer. I just acquired one during the holidays and I don’t know how I lived without it. Go get one.

Combine egg, butter, espresso, bananas, brown sugar, sugar and vanilla extract and mix on low… or… with a fork? How in the hell did I do this before my mixer?

Change the mixing whisk to the folding blade and slowly add in dry ingredients. Finally, add the walnuts.


Grease a loaf pan. Actually do you know what? Go ahead and also tray up some muffins because this recipe will actually yield a loaf and then some. My only set back was that my loaf pan was a bit on the deep side which ended up taking about ohhhhhh 80 minutes to finish. I should have only gone 1/2 as deep (that’s what she said) and used the rest for some delightful muffins. And then, dammit, a banana cream cheese frosting.


Bake for 45-50 minutes or until the center is done (standard procedure here… insert a toothpick to the center, if it comes out clean you’re all set). Let the bread cool in the pan for about 15 minutes. Run a knife along the edges and carefully remove from the bread from the pan. Cool on a rack for another 15-20 minutes before cutting. Don’t worry, it will still be warm enough to melt a slab of butter.


I don’t want to pat myself on the back, but after I jammed this bread into the oven I decided to crack open a few cookbooks to see how well I did (or not). Which is very, very me… read the instructions last. The Moosewood’s recipe (The Moosewood!) calls for THREE STICKS OF BUTTER. Are you effing kidding me? Excuse me, but did the recipe also come with a defibrillator? Other recipes I found used a lot more sugar and oil.


Aside from the long bake time I’m hear to say that my banana bread was freaking incredible. A smidge of butter and, man, I was all the way back in Waukesha, Wisconsin again.


Now excuse me, I have to sort through the recipe aggregators rejection emails in my in-box. Fuck.

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